Everything has its indications and signs. Indications that knowledge is beneficial are that it leads to fine character, good manners and praiseworthy attributes. In this regard it was said: “He whose knowledge doesn’t cause him to weep, can be justifiably considered not to have been granted beneficial knowledge, since Allah (swt) described the people of knowledge saying:
“Say: Believe in it (the Qur’an) or do not believe. Verily! Those who were given knowledge before it, when it is recited to them, fall down on their faces in humble prostration. And they say: “Glory be to our Lord! Truly, the promise of our Lord must be fulfilled”. And they fall down on their faces weeping and it adds to their humility.” (17:107-9)
Thus knowledge carries its possessor towards humility, prostration, crying, calling oneself to account and truthfulness with Allaah.
Indeed crying is the clearest sign and best proof of the knowledge one possesses and of a person’s truthfulness. What is the benefit of knowledge a person learns, if it doesn’t lead him to crying, humbleness, penitence and good dealings with the people?
Is not the possessor of knowledge one who knows most about his Lord swt? Has he not read about His Exalted, Perfect, Lofty Attributes that which causes his heart to humble and his eyes to shed tears?? Has he not read in the Book of Allah and in the sayings of the Messenger of Allah saw, texts pertaining to the Fire, the terror in the grave and the fearfula ccounts of the Resurrection because of which mountains are humbled out of the fear of Allah (swt)?
So compare your position to this – may Allah have mercy upon us – and dont forget that virtuous saying, “He who’s knowledge doesnt cause him to weep, can be justifiably considered not to have been granted beneficial knowledge”.