The Affairs in Which the Husband Does Not Obey His Wife Part 3 – Al-’Allaamah Muhammad Ibn Haadee al-Madkhalee


Ibn Battah (d.380H) – rahimahullaah – said, [1]

“And that he obeys her in being undutiful to his parents.”

Shaykh Muhammad Ibn Haadee al-Madkhalee – hafidhahullaah – said,

“This is impermissible and from the acts of wickedness and from distastefulness; that a man obeys his wife and disobeys his mother, or that he disobeys his father and obeys his friend. The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) informed that this is destruction, being disobedient to the parents. A person is disobedient to his parents and obeys his wife over his mother or a friend over his father, this is impermissible. The mother and the father’s rights are given precedence and the wife has her right, but if she commands him to be disobedient to his parents it will be impermissible for him to do so. This is because the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said,

“There is no obedience to the creation if it involves disobedience to the Creator.” [2]

So she is commanding him with disobedience so this is impermissible. Also severing ties of kinship is from the major sins and is impermissible and indeed Allaah the Glorified and Most High cursed the one who does it,

“Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship? Such, are they whom Allah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and blinded their sight.” [Soorah Muhammad :22-23].”

Then he (Ibn Battah) – rahimahullaah – said,

“Also providing relief to his brother in the Religion.”

Shaykh Muhammad Ibn Haadee says,

“Say for example that one of your brothers (in the Religion) fell upon hard times regarding his finances and he was in need of you, but your wife prevents you (from giving it to him), it is impermissible that you obey her in this.

“The believe to the believer is like a structure, one part supports the other.” [3]

So in this case it is upon you to provide relief to him if hard times befall him and you do not obey your wife. This is because in this instance, the wife commands with disobedience to Allaah the Most High and Exalted.

The son is a cause of cowardice and stinginess; he is a cause of his father having cowardice and to not fight and leave fighting in Allaah’s cause. He also causes the father to be stingy and leave spending in Allaah’s cause; so extending relief to your brothers in the religion and helping them out is from noble mannerism and lofty character. Books have been written solely upon this matter, such as Qadaa‘ul-Hawaa‘ij by Abil-Ghanaa‘im al-Narsee, which is an individual treatise regarding this. Also this has been written about generally in the books of hadeeth.

As for his (Ibn Battah’s) statement,

“Oppose them (i.e. the women) and you will be led aright and you will be blessed.”

The origin of the grading of this hadeeth is very weak and as-Sakhaawee reported it in his book: Maqaasidul-Hasanah, and he attributed it to ad-Daylamee in his book: Musnad Firdaws, and also to Ibn Laal in his Juz‘, and it is a hadeeth which is very weak.

Therefore, the likes of this has no origin from the statement of the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam). Likewise, the author has done well by not attributing it to the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam), but this was reported upon ’Umar (radiyallaahu ’anhu).”

End of article, and may Allah give us success to that which He loves and is pleased with, and may His prayers and salutations be upon Muhammad, his Family and Companions.

[1]: The following series is taken from the ninth lesson in Shaykh Muhammad Ibn Haadee’s explanation of al-Ibaanatus-Sughraa of Ibn Battah al-’Ukbaree (d.380H).
[2]: Saheeh: Related by at-Tirmidhee (no. 1707) and Ahmad in al-Musnad (no. 1098). It was authenticated by al-Albaanee in Saheehul-Jaami’ (no. 7520).
[3]: Related by al-Bukhaaree (no. 467), Muslim (no. 2585), at-Tirmidhee (no. 1928), an-Nisaa‘ee (no. 2560) and Ahmad in al-Musnad (no. 19127).
Translated by Abu Suhayl Anwar Wright

About Umm Abdulazeez

"I am a Muslim who is upon the Qur'aan and the Sunnah and upon the methodology of the Salaf As-Saalih (Pious Predecessors). And that can be said in short by saying, 'I am a Salafee' " [Shaykh Al-Albaanee رحمه الله] ________ Sufyaan Ath-Thawree (rahimahullaah) said: “Indeed knowledge should only be learned for the purpose of fearing Allaah. Indeed, knowledge has been given virtue over other than it because with it Allaah is feared.” [Jaam'i Bayaan al-'Ilm wa Fadlihi by Imaam Ibn Abdil-Barr (rahimahullaah)]
This entry was posted in Brother's Section, Family Matters, Shaykh Muhammad ibn Haadi al-Madkhali, Sisters Section. Bookmark the permalink.

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